Silence Is Loud

Honk if You're Horny! Did I just say that?

2011-10-30T19:14:00.000-07:00

Happy Halloween! Today I am going to show you how to make a proper hat for your work environment.

Any of you who know Alpha Man know that he really is a devil. Therefore, it is only appropriate that he wear horns for Halloween. He is, in many ways, a child at heart so I try to indulge him as much as possible plus he needs something to wear while he and Thing 2 go trick or treating in the neighborhood together. In the image below, you will see two hats. One is his hat from the place he used to work (it's tan), I had to remove the pieces from it to finish this project and the black one is the hat from the place he works now.

Normally, you would only need one hat but since this is a transfer, we had two.
You also need a hot glue gun, 2 circles of firm cardboard, slightly larger than the horn ends, 2 pieces of old fabric (I used a cut up holey sock from his drawer) and a pair of scissors. Oh! And my iPhone. I was actually making this as part of my flylady routine for the day, so I had to have the phone close by for using the timer and also the Pandora app. What did I ever do without that phone? I now carry the world at my fingertips.

Your first step is to cut a hole in the sides of the hat, a little smaller than the ends of the horns that rest against the head. This is because you not only need to allow for the glue but also for fraying the fabric so that it looks like the horns just shoved through, no longer able to be contained by a mere hat.

I'm sorry if my hands are dirty, I had just come in from working in the garden, pulling up the dead plants and thinking about putting in some Brussels Sprouts.
Your second step is to cut little snips around the edges of the holes and then pinch them over and over until you fray them out.

Next, take the hot glue and burn yourself with it a few times and glue the fabric to the back of the cardboard circle.

You need the cardboard for support and the fabric keeps the cardboard from rubbing around in the hair. While running the glue in a circle on the cardboard piece, burn yourself again just for good measure, then press the ends of the horns into the glue. By the way, we got those horns at Party City about 4 years ago. The paint is peeling so next year we will either repaint them or peel them completely.

Next, you insert and line up the horns inside the hat and at the a spot where the base joins the hat, you need to line it all the way around and (burn yourself!) press the fabric into it, taking care to make sure that the fray looks real.
Thing 1 took these pictures that have both of my hands in them. Didn't he do a great job? This, by the way, is the hard part and it's not hard.

Then you have the subject try on the hat. I done tol' y'all that he is a devil.

Now, some of you may be wondering what, if anything, happened to the other hat, the one from his previous job. We probably just threw it away, right? Oh, no. Not us! We did what any red blooded American family would have done. We torched it in the yard in a bizarre family ritual, complete with dance and chanting.

And Thing 2 roasted some marshmallows. Yep, that's a wire coat hanger, we like to do things fancy!

And that, as they say, is that. This is all that's left.

Beans, Beans ... They're Good for Your Heart

2011-08-04T19:44:00.000-07:00

We (aka You Know Who) like beans. I put them in soups and stir fry and all manner of household tasties. Well, tasties if beans are your thing. There was a time when my mom tried to make me eat some beans from a can and I was too little to say anything other than "BUG!" and she kept trying to force it and then she looked and there was a big, brown beetle in there. That pretty much ruined the bean experience for me, though I would stand at the stove and pick the choice bits of ham out of the pot as I got older. Anyway! Alpha Man enjoys a tasty pot of beans and they're very healthy and inexpensive.

I usually keep a variety of canned ones on hand but haven't seen a coupon for them since I've started couponing again. I did, however, have 3 bags of dried ones in the pantry and beans freeze well so I soaked them and cooked them with no seasoning in order to try out something that I have deemed to be wildly successful. Yes! WILDLY! Successful.

I took the pot of cooked beans and set my muffin tins out on the counter. Then I measured out 1/2 cup portions of just beans into the muffin cups.

My friend asked me "Why half cup portions?" and I went on a 30 minute dissertation on portion sizes and being able to measure them out for recipes (I wanted to make m'self look like I'm clever, you know!) but really, it's because the muffin tins only hold half a cup :-P

After that was complete, I took the bean juice and poured it in to the top. This was so they would all stick together when frozen.

Then I stuck them in the freezer till the next day, when I ran a large rectangular pan full of hot water and set the tin in it for a few seconds and let the cubes come loose, lifted them out and put them back in the freezer for 13 minutes to refreeze the sides.

Toss them in a bag and you have a dozen 1/2 cup portions to add to any recipes. 3 pounds of beans made way more than a dozen, though, I worked on this for 2-3 days before they were all put up.

They're already cooked and just need seasoning. It takes about 2 minutes to thaw 2 of them in the microwave but some recipes I don't even thaw, I just toss them into whatever pot they're going in.
By the way, from a budget standpoint, this is waaaaayy less expensive than beans from a can it just takes more work plus you have the added benefit of knowing what's in your food.

And it's NOT a big, brown beetle.

Making Corn Pops Be Edible AKA Don't Waste Food!

2011-07-19T08:39:00.000-07:00

Corn pops are, in my opinion, cold cereal's greatest fail. I never liked them as a child and I still do not. Neither do my children. Therefore, I'm unsure of why I ended up with a box in my pantry. They were destined for the food pantry when one of the children opened the box up one day, ate a bowl, and deemed the remains inedible. So here I was, stuck with them and nobody willing to take one for the team.

Today while cleaning in the kitchen some (a never ending job for a chronically messy person such as myself) I looked over at that open box as it mocked me from the cereal shelf, ridiculing my choices and my unwillingness to throw away perfectly good food. I decided it was time for some action. I opened the pantry door and spied a bag of reject marshmallows, took them out, and it was on.

These marshmallows turned out to be way too big for roasting and too big for s'mores, so they have been languishing in the bottom of the pantry for quite some time, begging for attention and love, which is what all marshmallows really need. You can clearly tell this is fact by this photo I took during a rare moment of marshmallow activity.

So I weighed the marshmallows out and cut them into small pieces and followed the recipe for Rice Crispy treats using the corn pops.

After they had set and gotten cool, thus less gooey, I cut one out and looked at it. It was, of course, a much more lumpy texture than crispies but still all glued together from the marshmallow goo. Then I plated them up.

So far, they are being given a passing grade in our extensive food testing facility. There have been no complaints from the rabble, I mean, the customers and the supply is beginning to dwindle. Weill I make them again? No. I hope to never buy another box of Corn Pops unless it's an accident.

Saving money on boneless, skinless chicken breast

2011-07-17T21:12:00.000-07:00

Here is the post I promised several weeks ago about how to save money on chicken breasts. Lots of people LOVE chicken breasts but hate the price because they are always expensive! Not anymore if you just follow what I am about to show you.

This week, bone-in split breasts are on sale for $1 per pound. That's half the price of boneless, skinless breasts and I promise you that the bone in those things does not weigh much at all and you can do magical things with it. So wait for a good sale and then stock up if you have the freezer space! Here is a breast and my set up for boning it.

And here is a pic of the breast with some arrows to show you where you want to cut with your knife. See that line of fat on the bottom? If you start putting some small cuts there, you'll feel the knife come to the bone. Just start rolling your cuts in from there, staying as close to the bone as possible.

Then when you get to about the center, come up underneath and start cutting from the underside. This side will be a little easier, because you can use the cartilage as a guide. The breast will come off very easily. Also, pay attention to the long, teardrop shaped muscle that I've pointed out. It's special.

THAT, dearhearts, is your tenderloin. It is the choice piece of the breast, which, for many, are already choice pieces. It's the piece that you will see sometimes in packages and more expensive than regular chicken breast. I like to bone enough breasts that I have a batch of these and then either freeze them for later or make a batch of tenders. A lot of store bought tenders are just sliced breasts. If you bone them yourself, you should have a tenderloin on every piece and that alone makes it worth it to me to do the work myself.

So pull the bone back, and the end will usually have a tiny bone that you have to cut around. Don't throw the bones away! Toss them in a bowl to make stock with.

Pull off the tenderloin and set it aside. There is a thin membrane separating it from the breast, so this is easy. Then pull off the skin. This part is easy, too. I don't throw this away, either. Now you should have one large breast and one tenderloin. Do this again with each breast until you're finished with the amount you have bought.

I do this with several pounds of chicken at one sitting usually, but this time, I did one 4 lb package just to make this post. But when I do 30 pounds, I will pack them in portions of 2 or 4 and seal them for freezing with my foodsaver. I also sometimes slice them along the length and freeze them on a sheet pan before tossing them in a bag just like the IQF breasts at the store.

Next, I will put the bones in a pot, cover them with water and boil them for a short time, then remove them and take the bits of cooked meat off and make a pot pie or something right away. You can also make a great soup with them, just toss the bones back in and simmer them for a while so that your stock will be very rich, remove them and add whatever soupy things you like. Being a great cook isn't really a science.

Next (and this is not for everyone especially if you are afraid of fat, which I'm not lol) take the chicken fat and skin you cut off and dice it up into bite size pieces, slice an onion and throw it all into a heated pan. Salt and pepper them.

Stir these a LOT and let them get brown and crispy and the onions will sometimes burn a little and caramelize, however imperfectly, the fat will render and you can even save that out and use it to brush on vegetables when you roast them.

I added the frog because I read once that you need something green on your plate.

THIS is my favorite part. Your arteries will be begging you for mercy but your soul will love you.

Canning Your Own Salsa When Your Gardening Skills are Lacking

2011-07-05T17:56:00.000-07:00

I will admit it...I am not a gardener. I grew up in a family of people who were and ARE fabulous with plants. Unfortunately, I am lacking that gene. I did grow a garden once and I guess if you sweat on it enough, you can get a lot from it, but ever since, my plants have died. I must not sweat enough!

I've been working this week on rearranging my pantry to accommodate the flux of groceries lately. I've been getting rid of things I bought that I haven't used, like the clam juice and jalapeno jelly and making room for things that we will use like Heinz 57 and grill spices. While I was working, I found a bulk size can of tomatoes so I decided to make some salsa for Alpha Man and his coworker. I've done it like this before, there was a time when I matched up a coupon to a sale on canned tomatoes and couldn't stop myself from buying them until ALL of the coupons were gone because the tomatoes were free. I think that when I was done, I had 240 cans. And I LOVE canned tomatoes. I don't like them fresh at all, but from a can, mmmm.

So I started with this set up, but first, I got the Jell-O ready.

Jell-O? Oh, it has nothing to do with the salsa, but I have it on good authority that the key to being a great mom is in keeping the Jell-O coming! So you new parents forget all those things you've read in books, just keep up the Jell-o! Anyway, here's the setup.

First, get your water bath canner and jars ready so the jars will be hot when you need them. Adding your hot tomatoes to cold jars can cause them to break. I did this without a canner for a long time and just had an insert in the bottom of a stock pot, but then I found this lovely old enamel canning pot with a rack at a thrift store for $2.99. Setting the jars on the bottom of the pot with nothing under them can cause them to break, too. SO just buy a canner. They're about 20 bucks and come with some really great accessories. Get your jars on the fire with a pot of water and then start on the tomatoes.

You see a BIG can of tomatoes and a packet of salsa mix plus a 4 cup measuring cup. That packet of mix has the instructions on the back and was on clearance last year for 10 cents. The first thing I like to do is take out about 4 cups of whole tomatoes (no juice) and set them aside to roughly chop later. Then I stick the immersion blender down inside and make a seedy puree, like this!

After this, I like to slide a slotted spoon around in there and see if there are still any whole tomatoes, then roughly chop the tomatoes and add them back in. Take a 1 cup measuring cup and measure your tomatoes into a large stainless steel pot to make sure you have the amount the recipe calls for. I've had to open a small can before and add a few to get an extra cup. Don't start daydreaming or A) you'll lose count ... was that 7 or 9? and B) this will happen! Curse you, attention deficit!

Once you have them measured, you may have to pour them back into the can and then make the mixture of vinegar and mix powder in your pot before readding the tomatoes. Always follow the directions on the packet. The companies who make these things know a lot about how to prevent your home canned goods from developing botulism and they make the recipe for that. Once your tomatoes have processed according to the directions, take a jar grabber and lift a few out and pour out the water. This can get a drip on your hand, so wear a mitt if you don't have an abnormally high tolerance to pain like I do.

I like to set out half the jars and fill them to within a 1/4 inch to the rim using my funnel and a cup.

Fill your jars and get the lids ready. They should be in a pan with some very hot, but not boiling, water. This is the spot where you realize you put the wrong size lids in earlier and have to get back into the canning supplies to find the right size.

Put the new lids in the very hot water for a bit and let them get hot, wipe the jars around the top to get any residue off (this is necessary! Particles between the jar and the rubber seal can prevent you from getting a good seal), and seal with the lid and the rings. Do this until you are out of mixture. If you have an incomplete amount at the end, eat it! Don't can a half jar.
Then, put them back into the pot.

Process according to the package directions and when you are done, you will have a batch of salsa that I promise you will love!

It's not sweet like the stuff in the store, though, but more like the stuff that you are brought to the table in a Mexican restaurant. After that, enjoy!

Love V8? Try making your own in 5 minutes for pennies on the dollar!

2011-06-28T16:25:00.000-07:00

Around here, someone (*cough*cough* Alpha Man!) likes to drink V8 juice. It's pretty expensive in my opinion and has some stuff in it that I don't think should be in food. This is the stuff they call "Natural Flavorings" which could really be anything, but is often MSG.

Instead, I make him my very own knockoff with a few simple ingredients from the kitchen.

I take these:

One can no sodium tomato paste
4 cans water
Mix well
1 teaspoon celery salt
1/2 teaspoon onion powder
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
pinch pepper
6 teaspoons sugar or splenda
3 shakes of worcestershire sauce
1/2 teaspoon horseradish

Several shakes of hot sauce (optional)

I didn't have any garlic powder this time so I threw some in the grinder and powdered it, myself.

So you take all of the ingredients and mix them up (a whisk works best, trust me!) and they will look like this.

Chill and pour and you have a refreshing drink! I made a fancy umbrella for this one out of a cupcake liner and a piece of my hat.

So, there you have it. The can of tomato paste was 35 cents and there are just a few cents worth of other stuff in there. try it! You might find that it tastes a lot better than the stuff in the bottle.

How She Got 12 Bottles of Miracle Whip for 1 Dollar

2011-06-24T21:17:00.000-07:00

Alpha Man LOVES Miracle Whip. He goes through about 1 22 ounce bottle a week if it is a week with a high sandwich-to-hot meal ratio. These things are really expensive and, of course, in my neverending search to provide him with everything he loves, I try to buy them. Buying the cheap stuff doesn't work though I have slipped it into his MW jar before and tricked him! When he reads this, he'll tell me that he wasn't fooled hahaha

This week, I started shopping at CVS. While I was browsing their ad, I noticed there was a deal that had Miracle Whip for $2.50. That was an OK deal, I guess. Then I noticed there was a $10 gas card if you bought $30 in select items and the MW was included. I started doing math in my head. 12 bottles would be $30, but there was a problem. CVS doesn't carry 12 of...well...anything, really.

This evening, we ran a bunch of unexpected errands. In a city the size of Birmingham, there is a CVS every few blocks. So, as we moseyed towards home, we stopped at CVS stores. Yep. I was whipping up miracles. At each store, I would buy a few bottles and use a $1 off coupon on each one. 12 bottles = $12 in coupons, thus my bill magically became $18 after coupon. Then, there was the matter of the gift card. As soon as I bought the 12th bottle, the register printed out a coupon for a free $10 gas card. I needed gas anyway, but instead of paying for it, I chose to pay for sandwich spread. After gift card, my bill was now $8, which is where the real magic begins. I have this rebate for $7 back when you buy $14 or more in condiments. I'll send it off tomorrow and, in 4-6 weeks, will get back 7 of the 8 bucks. I just couldn't resist the math on 12 bottles for 8.3 cents each.
And now we're stocked up for sandwich season.

And I would have never gotten to see what the little one calls "The Whipmobile"

Using Rebates to Your Advantage

2011-06-20T09:47:00.000-07:00

Today, we're going to talk about rebates. I know, I know, I said it would be chicken breasts but we ate the ones I bought and I didn't get any pics. I LOVE rebates. They are a great incentive to try new products, to BUY products, and to recoup some of your out of pocket expenses. Today is Monday. I went to Food Giant to take advantage of their double coupon policy. Here is what I bought.

2 bricks of coffee
6 bags of sunflower seeds

2 small Sunny D
1 box of cereal
3 French fried onions (snacks!)
3 BBQ sauce
3 canned tomatoes
1 worcestershire
3 packs of napkins
1 large cabbage
1 cucumber
1 bell pepper
1 bag of salad
1 thing of ground pepper
1 salad dressing
1 roast beef spread
1 bottle of spicy brown mustard
3 packs of hot dogs
3 packs of bologna

I spent $9.96 after coupons and tax. I know bologna and hot dogs aren't the healthiest things, but the autistic boy will only eat certain things and certain brands. I don't believe in forcing my kids to eat food they don't like just because it was the best deal. Instead, I stock up when I can get their preferred items for the lowest price.

Now, we will talk about rebates. The box of cereal has a Try Me Free rebate on it. That means that after spending my $9.96, I will get back $4.14 of that. I usually sink about $40 a month into rebates.

A month ago, I bought some really great Johnsonville bratwurst patties for $7.99. As I was loading them into the car, I noticed a sticker advertising an opinion poll on the side of the box. I came home and cooked the patties for dinner and then took the poll. For doing the survey, in Friday's mail, I got a $20 cash card. I will take that card and turn it into $100 worth of stuff. Thanks, Johnsonville! And those patties were fab!

I know, not everyone has the time or the inclination to use coupons and rebates and look for the best deals. But just remember when you see that coupon person in the store that they're not necessarily a crazy hoarder with a garage full of diapers and no babies. Maybe they're just an average person who wants to save money in a crappy economy. We've recently started a new homeschooling class that we're calling "Philanthropy". This was our first round of things that we took to the food bank. I don't mind buying things we won't use just so that we can donate them. Even in better times, we weren't able to do this, and here we are now, one downsized job later and high gas prices and we're doing a small part to make the world a better place. And that's huge.

Alpha Man says "I'm pretty sure that this means you're the devil." Hahahah

Oh, and if you guys see any rebates in your stores, grab one and gimme a holler!

Why I Love Mondays ... Know Your Stores!!!

2011-06-13T07:30:00.000-07:00

We have a small store here, locally owned since the 50s, called Food Giant.
When we moved here, they doubled coupons on Monday only, up to 90 cents. They recently changed this to $1 which is absolutely phenomenal to a coupon shopper. Mondays in there are CRAZY! Everywhere you look, there are men and women with coupon binders and shopping carts full of groceries. Here is what I got today and I promise this will be my last coupon post for a few times or at least until the ads come out on Wednesday.

This is a picture of today's foodstuffs. I bought
3 1 pound bags of tilapia fillets (1.59 each)
1 package of split chicken breasts (1.97)
3 Diet Mt Dew
3 bricks of coffee (1.00 each)
3 assorted Hidden Valley Ranch dressings (1.00 each)
3 bottles of worcestershire sauce (2 free, one I paid $1.18 for so that I could use a $1 off meat coupon)
2 bags of sunflower seeds
3 small Sunny Delight (free)
1 head of cauliflower (.59)
2 cans of canned tomatoes (.08 each)
2 pounds of hot dogs
4 things of ravioli (free)
3 things of Tic Tac (free)
4 100 Grand bars (free) (which are already safely tucked away in my desk drawer where I will not tell the fam that they even exist and I will instead hoard them and relish them bite by incredibly tasty bite...

I spent $20.71 and the bill should have been about $6 less but when your coupon says "Buy 2 and save $1" and one is $1.19, the computers are set to only double up to the price of one because they don't do overage. However, I've been told that I can hand those over and they will double them manually so knowledge is power!
I will now take my receipt and use it with a rebate offer and get back $10.
My favorite deal? Probably the tilapia fillets. I love those things! I would fill up a freezer with them, but alas...they limit you to 3 like coupons per trip.

So, know your stores! We have a different store where I shop for almost all of our produce because they are LOTS cheaper than anywhere else and the veggies are fresher. They also do occasional tent sales and markdowns but they do not double coupons. One time, though, I did get a bunch of toilet paper there for free, on sale for $1 per pack and I used $1 coupons. It actually lasted us through Alpha Man's job change. I miss that toilet paper.
Next up? Saving money on boneless, skinless chicken breasts.

Round 2 of Couponing for Normal People...+ a breakdown!

2011-06-08T09:50:00.000-07:00

I think that today, I will be doing a round 2 of coupon shopping detail. Again, part of my reasoning is because I want to show how that tv show is unrealistic. Some of them, as you may have noticed, get very defensive when others use the words "hoarder" or "OCD" ... This just in! If you need to be defensive about your actions, it is probably something you need to scale back on and/or not do.

Yesterday I went into Birmingham to get a few groceries. Last week, there was a coupon for free milk when you buy 4 packs of yogurt. Coupons for the yogurt came out on Sunday. I already had a few so for the past week, we've enjoyed free milk and cheap yogurt. Then, I decided that it was too good of a deal to pass up on the milk because the boys and I have been wanting to make fresh mozzarella for our ongoing class called "Cheese". So, yesterday, we went to 3 stores and above is a picture of what we bought.

At the first store, I picked up 7 Diet Mt Dew and took advantage of a coupon that the bottles had on them for 50 cents off one bottle. This doubled to $1 and the Dews were part of a 10 for 10 sale so the drinks were free. I only bought 7 and left at least that many on the shelf for the other shoppers. I also bought 2 bags of salad and used another coupon from in the store on the salad display. The salads were 2 for 2.99 and the coupon was for 1.50 off 2, thus my 2 bags of salad and 7 drinks were $1.49 plus tax.

My next stop was another store where I made my bulk purchase. At this store, I had a coupon for $5 off when you buy $30. You can use those together with other coupons to make your bill even lower. At this store, I bought 2 bricks of coffee, 2 boxes of tea bags, 8 yogurts and 2 milks for a total of $31.54.
2 coffees @ 2.99 each plus 2 $1.00 off coupons
2 tea bags @ 1.09 each plus 2 .40 coupons, doubled to .80 each
8 yogurt @ 2.00 each + 8 1.00 coupons
2 milk @ 3.69 each + 2 free milk when you buy 4 yogurt coupons

$5 off when you buy $30

My total coupons for this trip totaled $23.98. and my out of pocket expense was 7.56 plus tax.

After we left, we went down to the next block to the last store. This was not a long trip that used a lot of gas, it was something we would have done anyway. It's hot out, so we use our AC but if we get thirsty, we have a cup that has free refills at the gas station fountain. However, I always pack a big jug of ice water before we leave, there is nothing that quenches thirst like ice water. According to Alpha Man, I am wrong about this and maybe even crazy. Anyway! On to the next store.

This store had Crunch bars on sale for .50. We had one coupon for $1.00 off 2 crunch bars. Here, I decided to grab one more gallon of milk and 4 more packs of yogurt. How do I get so many coupons? I SAVE them, just like saving coins in a bucket. There are always coupons available for products, manufacturers WANT you to try their stuff. Nobody is required to use a coupon as soon as they get it so when mine come out in the paper or from a promo or from a printable site, I SAVE them until a store puts the item on sale. No sale? No problem! They expire and more coupons arrive. Sometimes, I do buy more than one newspaper. This week was one of those weeks. I ended up buying 8 because the coupons were good and I needed the newsprint to mulch my garden with. Several people give me their coupons and in return, I give them random free groceries. This is another one of those couponing no brainers. This week's newspapers have already paid for themselves. I was taught that a good rule of thumb is 2 newspapers per family member.

SO! At the last stop, I picked up
2 Crunch bars for $1 (and we get a nice treat)
8 packs of Nesquik on sale $10 for 10
4 yogurts for $2 per pack
1 gallon of milk for $3.85
1 box of Shells and Cheese for $1.66

I used a $1 off 2 coupon on the candy, 8 50 cents off any Nesquik item coupons, doubled to $1, $1 off each yogurt, a free milk when you buy 4 yogurts and a 50 cents off the Velveeta, doubled. My total after coupons was 4.76 plus tax.

So my total yesterday for everything in the picture was about 15 bucks. I did it all legally and I did it all ethically. I didn't do anything that will hurt other shoppers' budgets. It's not hard to save money on your food, it just takes thought (math!) and planning and you have to eat what's on sale. And respect other humans. There is too much of a me me me mentality out there and other people want to save money on their bills, too.
Respect your cashiers, respect your stores, and respect the other shoppers.

Not So Extreme Couponing ... We'll Call it "Normal People Couponing"

2011-06-07T08:27:00.000-07:00

I love coupons and great deals. Being a stay at home mom and a homeschooler, I think that I often sacrifice a little bit more than average just so I can stay home with my kids and provide them with an education.

My little one loves the TLC show "Extreme Couponing". I like it, too, but in a sense that I would rubberneck a train wreck. He wants me to fill our house up with groceries for 35 cents. This is not realistic. Here are some reasons why.

If you watch the show, you will see the shoppers buying entire pallets of Powerade and/or Vitamin Water. This is a trick they're doing to get their numbers up for the show. Most stores offer regular deals on both of those items. Pair them with a coupon and you get free product. Sometimes you can even use a coupon for "Free Stuff when you buy Vitamin Water" and get more free stuff. This is really a no brainer. So, they buy 200 bottles and use 200 coupons. What they DON'T say is the amount of work they put into acquiring those coupons. They've literally spent weeks gathering them together.

These people apparently live in areas where they don't have a grocery tax. We have that here in Alabama. My grocery bill will never be zero.

Pay attention to their baskets. Do you really want to feed your family Yakisoba noodles, barbecue sauce and candy every day?

I recently got back into couponing after a 3 year hiatus. When I learned, I was taught strong ethics by my coach and the phrase "Fly under the radar" was used often. To this day I am thankful for that. Sometimes, some of these people on TV are dipping their feet into the grey area of couponing that we will call fraud. They will justify it however they feel like they need to, but I stand by the statement "Just because you can does not mean you should." Exercise impulse control. It is good for kids to see the parent controlling themselves.

Now, here is the part where I will detail a normal shopping trip for a normal person.
Yesterday, I went to a store here that is called Food Giant. They double coupons up to $1.
Pairing up ads with sales, I bought
2 bags of cat litter for .38 each
4 jars of spaghetti sauce for .75 each
1 package of cat treats = free
3 boxes of microwave popcorn for 1.24 each
6 packages of hot dogs for .19 each
1 can of French fried onions for .68
6 dish scrubbies for .43 each
2 bottles of L&P worcestershire sauce for 1.18 each
A small package of beef ribs .50
A pound of ground turkey .50
2 small steaks for appx 1.25 each

Now, because I don't have a goal of getting my number down to zero, I am perfectly happy with what I spent. I can take some of the money saved and put it in a jar for a weekend trip to the beach which we keep promising the kids and not delivering on.
Today I am making a run to another store for drinks, milk, yogurt, and coffee. I have a specific plan and a list with coupon matchups. However, the store is often sold out because there are people who will buy ALL of a deal because they don't care if anyone else gets to save money as long as they're getting theirs. We'll see what happens, because I don't go to multiple stores, looking for the same deal. Gas is too expensive for that.

And I WON'T be spending 4 hours in line at the checkout.

Yard Sale Tupperware! WOOT!

2011-05-22T19:07:00.000-07:00

I was raised in a yard saling family. I remember going on weekends when I was a kid, my mom would fill up the station wagon with me, my sister, my brother and whichever of my cousins that wanted to go. There were always so many of us that someone or two had to ride in the hatch area. So we would take our allowances and go out town to the yard sales.

When I was a teenager, this became a little embarassing when she would shop sales that were in my home town but I outgrew that. In the last few years o her life, we would often hop in my car and go together, looking for treasures. It's one of those things I am glad about.

Lately, I've been teaching my little one about yard sales. He loves them and wants to go with me whenever we find one. The oldest will slink down in the car and pretend he isn't there, but not the youngest. Today, we were on our way shopping and stopped at one. We strolled past the usual boxes of dusty shoes, VHS tapes and used lipsticks, half-full bottles of lotion, etc waded through the racks of too-small clothing when I spied this in amongst the tattered, self-help books on a bookshelf. In a split second, I knew I must have it.

One of the things I love about the doctor's office is that they always have some cool gadgets to play with, like model bones and body part posters. I handed it to the little one and told him to go ask the lady how much it was. Being an obedient child, he did, and she said "50 cents!" it will be a great item when we do our anatomy class! It has a little pull-out drawer with a piece of paper inside that details how to use the model. As we were headed to pay, I noticed a box on the end of a table....

I love pricey kitchen stuff. I DON'T love paying for pricey kitchen stuff. One of what I call my hobbies is upgrading my kitchen items via thrift stores and yard sales. I have a weakness for Tupperware but it's so expensive! Every piece I own has come from a thrift store or a yard sale, and I have never paid more than $3 for one, that one being a giant green mixing bowl with a lid, my mom used hers for many things and I do, too.

I rummaged around in the box and removed some recycled sandwich meat containers and some partially melted rubbermaid bowls and several lids that didn't have bowls to go with them, then I carried this up to the lady at the desk and set the bones down with the box.

The veggies and dip server was $1 and I'll use that thing a LOT
I needed some airtight canisters and there are 1 large, 5 medium, and 1 small of the ones with red lids. There are 2 small ones with beige lids. I'm not sure what the orange thing is but I'll use it for something, probably spaghetti.
She charged me $3 for everything in that box, including the dip server. They're dirty where they've been in the garage, but half are running through the dishwasher tonight and the other half will be tomorrow. What a great deal for only having to wash them! I spent all day being happy about that box of Tupper.

And that was our day. Yard sales rock!

Things That Make You Go Mmmmmmmm

2011-05-11T11:24:00.000-07:00

Today's entry will be about one of my favorite things to eat, we grew up calling it Slim Toast! You may have encountered this dish before under one of its pseudonyms, hen in a nest, popeye, moon egg, egg in a basket, toad in the hole, eggs-in-toast, cowboy egg, and one-eyed jack.

The reason we called them Slim Toast was because my dearest cousin married a man named Slim, back when I was still very young. One day, they were hanging out with my mom (one of the coolest ladies in the entire world) and he mentioned that he had invented these fabulous treats. Mom had been serving them up to us for as long as I could remember and I can't remember if she told him that or not. I'm sure that he really thought he had invented them, though. Anyway! From that point onward, Mom called them Slim Toast and this is how you make them.

That's my mom's biscuit cutter...

You need 1 bread per egg and some butter. I like real butter. Medium eggs work best but all I had today were jumbos, so there will be some spillage. I also use just regular bread from a loaf, but there are some restaurants that use thick sliced, artisan bread.

Cut the hole, my bread tore on the side but I don't care, the egg will make it stick together.

Melt a pat of butter in the hole on med-low heat. I like to swirl it around in there so that when I crack the egg into it, it pushes the butter out into the sides.

Crack the egg into the middle and pop the yolk, I like cooked yolks. This is also where I like to add salt and pepper, break little bits of butter onto the corners, and put the lid on. After it sets some, you can turn them. It will probably leak some, it leaks less if you use a smaller egg and make sure you let it set.

After flipping them a few times, I always cut a slit in the middle to make sure the yolk is solid and if it is and the toast is golden brown, flip them out onto a plate. These are so good, and they always make me think of my mom and Slim, who are both no longer with us, and their great senses of humor, which is a prerequisite to marrying into my family. RIP you two, you are and will always be, missed.

Saving Money on Car Repairs

2011-05-08T16:23:00.000-07:00

I know there are many Do It yourselfers out there who do their own DIY car repairs. My husband is NOT one of those people. I used to work on an old Mustang that I had, and am comfortable with doing repair work on a 60s era car, but no matter how awesome of a car it would be, my guys want to have a vehicle with some modern amenities like ... oh let's see... A/C, power steering, seats that aren't pleather etc etc.

At the worst of the recession, when my husband lost the job that brought us to Alabama, we spent what we had saved up on a beat up, 90s model Toyota Camry. We had to, because he had been driving a company truck and we had to find something. The car definitely came with some issues but the motor was strong and it only had 75,000 miles on it. Now, I can hear many of you saying "That's young for a Toyota!" but those miles were teen-driven miles and the car was pushing 20 years old so we weren't delusional about making it last to 250,000 miles old. We used it to get us around town for errands and job interviews all the while the axles made a funny popping noise, the guy at the quickie lube place unplugged a crack that was in the radiator so it started leaking, it would sometimes not start and I'd have to have a jump, and the brakes started making noise. I bought some brake pads and brought them home. That was the first time I heard The Speech.

"I am not a mechanic. I am a technician."

So I placed an ad on Craigslist, offering $25 for someone to come over and do my brakes. Within minutes, I had 5 responses. I selected a guy who said he lived in our town and actually works for a shop as a mechanic. He showed up and fixed the brakes and said that when we got the new radiator, to give him a call. We did. He replaced the radiator and hoses for 50 bucks. By that time, we were filling the radiator up with water just to get around town and before we came home again).
He replaced the axles, the belts, the motor mount, and the wiper arms ("Those are not snowplows" he said after learning I tried to use them to wipe the snow off the windshield...) for $150. He said he'd do it for anything more than $50 so I gave him extra because I want him to stay willing to do the work.

Now, I have to buy the parts and I am OK with that. I didn't realize the markup that shops do on parts until I received an itemized estimate last month for a strut job, thinking it would be too hard for him to do in the driveway. The shop's estimate was over $900 for just the front end struts. Each strut assembly was listed at $322 just for the part so $644 for the 2 struts, not including labor, which was another $300.
I bought the struts at AutoZone for $165 for the pair. We borrowed a strut spring compressor tool from the loaner tool service there for free. He put my struts on for 100 bucks. The savings was phenomenal.

So if you are "not a mechanic" but need your car worked on, maybe check your local Craigslist. Ours has several guys who offer to do jobs at home, I got lucky the first time, you could too. And your bank account will thank you.

There's a fickle eater in my house!

2011-05-07T10:35:00.000-07:00

My youngest son is a fickle eater. It pains me greatly to say that, but it is true. One day, he loves tomatoes, the next day...I can't coax him to take a single bite. He has done this with bananas, pickles, olives, tacos, sandwiches, pasta, apples, eggs, mandarin oranges, the list goes on and on. He has a love/hate thing with chicken and can tell if I substitute ground turkey for ground beef in a recipe (ground turkey is easily less than half the cost per pound than ground beef...). The only constant for him has been his consistent love (since infancy) of plastic food and his love of candy.

It baffles me daily when we eat something that he previously enjoyed and suddenly, it is no longer on his list of acceptable foods. That doesn't mean that he won't love that item again in 2 months, 2 weeks, or even 2 days. I wouldn't call him a picky eater, just fickle. "I'm not in the mood for that anymore" he'll say, and he will choose to just not eat.

For the longest time, I have been making his plates into things that make him laugh or that he will call "fancy" and it is the greatest way yet to get him to eat his lunch and supper. It's not a banana, it's a smile. A slice of tomato can make great eyes, big, red clown noses, etc. He loves to have a layered sandwich like he sees on TV. I've discovered that he doesn't like sandwiches, but if they are made on brown and serve rolls or cut into little squares and served with toothpicks like hors d'oeuvres, he will eat in record time. It doesn't bother me to put a little extra love into his food. So, today I made him some lunch with some ham that he had deemed unacceptable yesterday and banana that he didn't like anymore last week. It came out like this.

Those are ham and cheese minis with sliced tomato and tomato ears (with marshmallow earrings), a banana, a sweet pickle nose, and 2 olives on toothpicks. Even when we're out of bananas, I try and garnish his plate with olives or something because those little touches make a huge difference in how he perceives his food. I don't know why unless it is something I learned once on food network when the chef said "You also eat with your eyes."
I always know what will happen when I set his plate down and his face lights up and I hold my breath till he says "Now THAT'S fancy!" I get back a plate that looks like this:

With the proper presentation, I can get him to eat almost anything. At least, for now, till he figures out my trick.

4 days with no power and we're still eating the mayonnaise

2011-05-06T10:46:00.000-07:00

We live in an area of Alabama that was affected by the recent storms. We didn't get hit by an actual tornado, but 100 mph straight line winds will take down trees, power lines, and roofs.

I woke up at 5:15 to the sound of the tornado sirens, the sight of the love of my life fumbling with the TV remote and just after 6 AM, we finally peeked outside and were greeted with this:

Now, that massive oak tree has a 15 foot circumference at its base (we used string and then measured the string) and used to provide the loveliest shade in our side yard every afternoon. The neighbor thinks it is 100 years old but I think closer to 200, unfortunately, the chainsaws couldn't get through the trunk for us to count.
So! It was 6:30 AM and there was a tree across the road on top of our power lines. Despite the fact that no one had had their caffeine yet, we were all wide awake. It was time for a little damage control.

The first thing I did was 'splain to the kids that complaining would not get them any results and not to make a bad situation worse.
The second thing was make sure that they all understood that my deep freeze was strictly OFF limits. I knew it would be several days before I even needed to look at the food in it to see if it was thawing out.
Then I called next door to see if they were ok because the tree was in their yard, too.

For the rest of the day, we all wandered around the neighborhood, looking at each other's trees and chatting about how it would be no easy fix. Well, all except for Alpha Man, HE spent the day napping. OK, OK, not the whole day...he did build me this ultra-fancy, high tech grill with cinder blocks from the garden and the bottom rack of the oven.

I had to be able to cook but didn't want to heat up the house using the stove, which is gas. I didn't even remember that I could light it manually until my beautiful mother in law told me. She may have saved the day with that, because at least we could have sweet tea. Here is a side view before we made some adjustments.

Now we had a method of cooking, so I set about looking through the fridge for things that needed to be eaten. I hate wasting food. We all ate ice cream that afternoon and grilled hot dogs that night.
Day 2 is when we realized that it would be days of no power. The street department came, though, and cut up the tree until they couldn't anymore, then they cleared the road by shoving the massive trunk aside with a tractor (I kid you not!) and moving on. That day, I emptied the fridge for the most part, ummmm...sortof....we ate scrambled eggs for lunch and I moved everything that needed it into the freezer compartment and stuck half a bag of ice in. The other half was in a cooler with some insulin. While I was in the freezer, I felt up a package of chicken breasts and they were still frozen in spite of the fact that we were in and out of the fridge getting things so I figured no worries. We also had many things in the cooler like the cheese, which we were nibbling on, and stuff like mayo.

In the meantime, we were all taking walks and sitting on the porch reading books and playing board games. At this time, the youngest son said "I like it when the power is out. We all pay attention to each other and not electronics!"

Day 3 is the day I took the hand saw and cleared off the branches on our trampoline. The other neighbor's tree fell onto it. That wasn't the first time a tree has fallen onto it, but the other time we just repaired the net and it was fine. The boys love the trampoline so much but after getting it cleared off, I discovered the frame is broken. The neighbor has offered to help get a new one but I hate asking when I know they are going to be spending a few thousand bucks clearing their yard of fallen trees. We ate supper at the church.

The next day, I went to the store and bought several bags of ice and as soon as I got home, we opened up the deep freeze and I felt around for things that were getting soft and shoved ice into all of the holes. I cooked my husband some lunch over a campfire with his late grandmother's cast iron Dutch oven, using things that needed to be eaten anyway. I threw into the hot pot a package of sausages, then cut straight into it an onion, a squash, a zucchini, threw in a can of black beans and another of tomatoes and let it cook.

In the end, it looked like this...It would have been awesome served over some rice. That's his grandmother's spoon, too.

At about 8 PM on the 4th day, the power men who came from North Carolina turned our electricity back on. They let it run all night and then turned it back off on Sunday morning to do some more work. It was turned back on at about 5 PM.
In spite of the fact that everyone I know personally threw out the entire contents of their freezers and refrigerators, I did not and I don't think anyone will be any the worse for wear. I'm not the only person who saved their food, as I spoke with several people in stores who were just as determined as I was and buying many bags of ice. I would say that this choice may not be for everyone, so always go by your USDA guidelines for food safety.

Take 2 turkey: How to bone and disjoint a bird if you aren't a tv chef

2011-04-25T12:06:00.000-07:00

I thawed out a turkey this week just to cut up for my friend Somebody's Nana, who has asked me to demonstrate my cutting techniques. Before I get started, I want to say a couple of things.

I am not a chef. In fact, I didn't know how to cook anything other than grilled cheese sandwiches and white rice until my late 20s, when I was introduced to Food Network and a show called "Cooking Live" with Sara Moulton. Under her daily tutelage, I blossomed like a wildflower into the cook I am today.
Always use a sharp knife when cutting a bird, plus turkeys have some ligaments that chickens don't have that you have to slice through. A dull knife is more dangerous than a very sharp one. I sharpen my knives every time I use them like this, using an old fashioned stick sharpening thing. I got it in a thrift store for about 50 cents. It looks like a sword and can easily be brandished as a weapon if my husband tries to pinch me while I am working.

I use my smallest knife for this. It gives me better control while I make short cuts.

Boning: Removing the bones

Disjointing: Cutting it up at the joints into pieces

So! Start with a thawed or fresh turkey, throw away the pop up timer and the thing that holds its legs together. Sorry about the repost of the image, I can't figure out how to remove the old one.

Cut the skin that holds the leg onto the bird so that you can see down in there. That looks gross, doesn't it?
Then come underneath the leg and cut until the knife stops. Here you want to use your fingertips and feel around at the joint for some marble-y feeling things. This is the ball and socket joint, your goal is to cut between the ball and the socket. Don't fret if you have to chew around in there with your knife until you get the feel of the joint.

Pull the leg back and keep cutting. Once you locate that joint, it will be easy.

Special props go out to the love of my life, who took the pics! In spite of his perving on me when I said "I need you to take some pics!" we still managed to get this done.

Take your fingertips and feel around at the wing joint (remember, it feels like marbles...) and cut until you feel it slip between the ball and the socket. We will talk about wings in a bit. I love making buffalo wings with turkey wings. They're big enough that my guys feel like they're getting a meal and it is a great way to use pieces that previously went to waste on a whole roast turkey.

Now on to the breast. The breast bone is at the top. Make a cut along the top and then start rolling it down with your hands and cutting. I don't do this like the TV chefs, but the end result is the same. It should come off in a nice, big piece but if it doesn't, so what? Use it in a stir fry or soup. We are having turkey breast tonight for supper. They are brining right now in a mixture of kosher salt, splendex and siracha. *Never* squirt some siracha into your mouth because you can't remember how spicy it is...0.o
It's a bad idea...

Now, turn the bird and firmly grasp the thigh and pull it in the opposite direction. It will snap and come loose at the joint. Look at my fingertip. See that white spot? That is the ball of the joint. The thigh will come off very easily after this. Try to cut it leaving as much meat as you can.
Repeat this process for the other half of the bird and toss the carcass in your scrap bowl. We will deal with it in a bit.

Now you can take the thigh and remove the bone. Put your knife as close to the bone as you can and make cuts till you have freed the bone. Toss it into your scrap bowl to be added to the carcass for stock. Now you have a boneless thigh cutlet that you can dice for recipes or cook in a myriad of ways.

You have another choice with the thigh. You can separate the legs and thighs and leave the latter bone-in or boneless OR you can make giant thigh quarters. If you're just going to boil a piece for a recipe, I would skip a step or two and just use a thigh quarter. Here we have a boneless thigh, a leg, and a quarter.

Fold the wings and feel for the joint then take your knife and cut between. Also remove the wing tips and add it to your scraps. This will make your wing and drumette for buffalo wings.

As you can see, now all that is left are the scraps. I usually put the neck and tail in the same package and boil them for lunches. I think the tail is one of the best pieces. I also package the giblets until I have enough for a batch of fried liver and gizzards (I'm a southern girl, what can I say?) and I freeze the skin and wing tips until I have a few pounds for schmaltz, which sure beats trying to find a butcher who will sell you 2 pounds of chicken fat. This time, I also froze the carcass because I don't need stock right now but it can wait till later.

I hope this helps someone with being able to not totally destroy their pieces while trying to get their bird cut up.

Starting BIG! What to do with a turkey.

2011-04-15T11:14:00.000-07:00

Really, I just want to get these pics out of my image folder because they are in my way! Plus, I think it will make a good practice post for uploading, etc...

A few months back, I found some Butterball fresh turkeys in the post holiday markdown bins at the grocery store. They were BIG turkeys, not close to expiring, and only $5 each. I bought them both with the intention of sticking them in my freezer but when I got home, I realized that they had a lot more potential boned and packed separately. So, I began.

The first thing I did was open up the turkeys, of course! Then, I removed the legs.

Definitely sharpen your knives before jointing and boning a turkey.

Then, I took off the wings and cut them at the joints. The wing tips went into the bowl for the scraps for making schmaltz.

Then, I carefully removed the breasts. Everyone loves a big breast! I gave them a nice squeeze.

After taking the meat off the thighs, I diced it up into bits for stir fry and soups.

Unfortunately, I had to decline the offer for assistance.

With a sharp knife and a lot of care, your carcass should look like this.

Then you put it on the stove in a big pot and cover it with water. Let it boil for about an hour, then *eye* took it out and carefully took off the cooked bits because otherwise they lose flavor. I ended up with 4 cups of precooked turkey for freezing and using in pot pies. Put the bones back into the pot and simmer them for several hours and you will have a thick turkey stock. After straining it, I made sure I had 10 quarts of stock, which, if I had paid $1 per quart at the store, would save me the cost of the turkeys at $5 each.

The cooked turkey bits....
Somehow, several pictures are missing from my hard drive so I will now list what I got for my $10 investment.

4 turkey legs ... store cost: $6
4 turkey wings ... store cost $6
4 5 pound boneless turkey breasts ... store cost $50
3 2 pound packages of boneless thigh meat ... guessing store cost $6 (can't find this in store)
4 cups of cooked turkey bits ... $5
10 quarts of frozen turkey stock ... $10
A bag of fat and skin for schmaltz and gribenes ... priceless.

The only way I could make this better would be if I took these neck bones below and made a crappy craft to sell.

And there you have it. I will never buy turkey in any form again but whole and cut it up.

End first post. This was pretty easy.